In The Mailbox: One of our clients sent a nice note thanking us for our assistance and the recommendation of a Weeping Cherry for a tree dedication. Honestly, I don’t remember making that suggestion, but the Weeping Cherry is one of my favorite ornamental trees and a stunning centerpiece for a memorial tribute. Check your zone out on a garden map, the Weeping Cherry does best in zones 5-8.

Added bonus for the Weeping Cherry tree is they are generally pest and disease resistant and don’t require a lot of pruning.

Here’s an example of a tree dedication, using a personalized river rock garden stone and a Weeping Cherry tree to honor Dave. Simple and elegant.

And then this:

Dear Lenette,

Thank you so much for all that you did to make Nelda’s memorial service even better than she had planned it.

I have always felt that the worst part of any funeral is the time when you leave the cemetery and leave behind someone you loved and have spent a lifetime with. Thanks to your generosity, I brought Nelda home with me and that was such a comfort at a very bad time.

The urn was beautiful (”bee-u-tee-full”, as Nelda would say) and M. loves and cherishes her necklace.

Thank you for letting us serve you.

Today a family called looking for an urn with the image of a griffin. I love the idea of this ancient symbol of protection on a cremation urn.

We’ve got a couple of griffins out in the garden. The legendary Griffin symbol is a fascinating creature with the body of a lion and the head and wings of an eagle. Variations of ancient lore say the griffin builds a nest, like an eagle (female?) and lays sapphires instead of eggs, and protects the gold. The feather of a griffin and the talon both are supposed to have medicinal properties so powerful that it can even restore sight to the blind!

The deceased collected griffins and even had a gryphon on his wedding ring. His ashes will be divided, and will be buried with a grandson and some of the family pets who passed earlier, including the ashes of the beloved Yorkie. The “baby”. The widow carries a bit of “baby Yorkie” in a small keepsake on her key chain.

At the memorial service the family incorporated griffin sculpture, statues, and relics among the family photo display.

In the urn world families are thinking SPRING. Searches lean to themes of nature: Butterfly Cremation Urns

Deer
Eagle Urns

DIY Memorial Garden

And Shamrock urns.

Funeral Report from PA:

The flowers were beautiful and the service was very nice..Nelda had asked the minister to do the service when Pauline’s mother died , she had picked the Legion and the caterer so most of it was done….there were 75 or more there and they stayed for the lunch and for about 3 hours after.. I have discovered an upside to cremation …you can bring the person home with you and that seems to make it easier somehow…Matt (Nelda’s grandson) gave a short eulogy and there was not a dry eye in the house as they say…he turned out to be the perfect choice…Nelda would have been so proud of the turnout….she always worried that she had no friends…..love to all in MO…..d

To my knowledge, Nelda is the first member of our family to be cremated. And for sure the first one to reside in the home AFTER the funeral. The plan is to scatter her ashes at a later date.

Here’s what we learned in the Garden this week:

The Executive Function of my frontal lobe appears to be diminishing. Last to develop, first to fade. God Help Me.

The frontal lobe of your brain houses your Memory Chamber and the Executive Function and controls your recall. Names, planning, managing distractions, and Multi-Tasking. Herein lies the problem. The Focus.

Add a little (d)icy weather to the mix and here we are! A precious hour was burned earlier this week chipping away and trying to break into the warehouse. I inhaled one can of de-icer and destroyed a brand new telescopic ice scraper. And no, I didn’t wear a mask, even though the label on the can suggested it.

Back to the frontal lobe. In a nutshell, evidently you can retard the shrinkage of your lobe and the fading of the functions with……DIET and EXERCISE!

The results of this week’s lobe research involved binging and interrupting the fitness schedule. New audio stimuli included sound effects. The crackle and crash of branches snapping, sounds of scraping, and frozen daggers falling from the sky. Where’s my nerve pills?

So, we practice gratitude and remember how lucky we are! We have power and have escaped the devastation of the last couple of weeks. Glory be to Jesus! (or whoever your higher power is)

Earlier this week, we received a message from one of our vendors in Memphis reporting that part of their warehouse was obliterated by the January storm that took over 60 lives.

So this would be a good time to salute our friends up north who are accustomed to the long and harsh winters. From the Winter Weather Wussies down here, We admire your strength and fortitude!

Also kudos to my friend Joel, who is a great guy and was dearly missed when he made a mid-life career change. Did he have any idea he’d be in FRONT of the camera, rather than behind it when he made the move? Now he’s in the hot seat and doing a great job.

And then: A Kind Word From A Client:

Thanks again for the necklace. It was very special to her and meant a lot to me (and to the other loved ones) that she had it on during the funeral and was buried with her. Splint (her beloved dog) is now with her always.

This has been a very terrible event in my life and I will always remember Kim and all the wonderful times that we spent together. She was truly one of my best friends, no matter how different she seemed. It seems to just now be hitting me.

One of our East Coast clients asked for your thoughts and prayers as she starts her journey into the Widow’s Club and her son mourns the loss of his father.

And finally, an email from my aunt regarding my grandmother’s ashes:

I was intending to send a small container of ashes out there that can be kept or scattered….so that a little of Nelda would be with her Missouri family….I think that she would like that…..love d

My reply: “Maybe we should take her to Branson!”

She loved that place!

Today’s Fitness Tip: Avoid consuming cabbage and fried food before strenuous exercise.

Nelda T. Dierwechter Ward, 86, of North Manheim Township, PA., died Thursday evening upon arrival at Good Samaritan Regional Medical Center.

Born in Schuylkill Haven, PA she was a daughter of the late William H. and Florence M. Hummel Dierwechter.

She was a maintenance worker for Boscov’s Department Store, Pottsville.

Surviving are a son, Lendal D. Neil, Fair Grove, Mo.; a daughter, Delphine O. Dierwechter Bohn, West Brunswick Township; a brother, Vernon L. Dierwechter, North Manheim Township; five grandchildren; seven great-grandchildren; and a great-great-granddaughter.

Memorial services will be announced at a later date. Leibensperger Funeral Homes Inc., Hamburg, is in charge of arrangements.

What a week! And Friday topped it!

I had an appointment with a local client who wanted to see some items for her pet. On the way to the meeting, the phone rang and a friend of the client introduced herself as “J” and stated that she would be acting as a representative for the client. Long story short: the client had passed away the night before. She was 46.

Well, that was kind of odd.

Frankly I was a wee bit nervous, the client had special ordered several styles of our pet urns.

J was only interested in one item.

The day before she died, client told J about our meeting and how special the necklace was and that when she died she could be buried with her “baby” close to her heart.

J found my number on her friend’s cell phone noted as “urn lady”.

Next: We pack up the urn for my grandmother.

Dad sat in my living area used the laptop to pick out the urn.

Very courageous. As a retired firefighter from one of the busiest firehouses in the nation, he’s not exactly an advocate of cremation.In the car on the way to lunch, I asked my dad how he would eulogize his mother.

Silence.

Music UP: “I Did It My Way”.

Tim had an interesting post on Final Embrace regarding internet shoppers and how they’ve affected the funeral industry. The internet has made a dent in the funeral director’s world. But the funeral director needs to look in the mirror.

Cue up Cher, “If I Could Turn Back Time”. On the local scene I’ve interviewed funeral directors that left me shaking my head. Several years ago, we (me, myself and I) surveyed the local market to determine what the cremation landscape was like. The numbers reflected growth, but were low compared to other parts of the country.

Frankly, what I saw was a market not being properly served. Insert disclaimer here: “We do not actively pursue sales in the state of Missouri.”

I was looking at the big picture, reading the trades, looking at the projections. I knew that the growth was there.

So the conversation on the local scene was a surprise, when these middle aged men admitted that:

1. Cremation was growing
2. Cremation families usually didn’t purchase an urn
3. Many of their cremation clients HAVE money and choose not to spend it at the funeral home.

While discussing sales numbers with an experienced gentleman who retired from the highest volume operation in SW MO, he was surprised at the number of urns I sold per month. Waaaay more then he imagined.

Another operator who morally despises cremation, admits that cremation is now 30% of his business, and continues to climb said, “If I was 20 years younger, I’d do things a lot different.”

Right. What are you doing today?

And the real kicker? The one that still makes me smile: “Buying an urn on the internet is undignified.”

Why? Is it because I’m not wearing a suit while I run the client’s credit card?

Some funeral directors have told me they have “exclusive” arrangements with their vendors and only carry what said vendor doles out. This usually comes from the director that just said the families aren’t buying an urn.

I understand about relationships with your vendors and I’m all about the service. But if the product is not working for you or your families… then maybe it’s time to look at options that DO serve your interests. I have years of experience dealing with sales weasels representatives and trust me, if you are a good customer, your “friend” will do what is necessary to keep your business.

Most of my clients are Boomers and X’rs. Most know what they want, many have been to the funeral home and didn’t find what they were looking for. And some, well, I’m doing the funeral directors a favor by shielding them from the frustration of the family that googles “cheap urn”.

Note to self: Add category for cheap urns.

As a consumer, I don’t want to spend a great deal for funeral goods. Most people I know feel the same way. Certain members of my family prefer burial and that wish will be honored with services likely to be held at the funeral home. Personally, I like one stop shopping. I don’t see myself shopping online for a casket. But if $5000 is the national average for a burial, it’s still more than I want to spend.

Today’s Thought for the Day: Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.

Dali Lama

Nutty week in the garden: Friday Yoga was a gift. The best. My teacher has introduced a style of seamless breathing that helps quiet the mind and relax the body. I find myself using it when I start to feel anxious. Usually I picture a figure eight as I concentrate on a smooth inhale and exhalation. Today, as we focused on the breath, this image came to my mind.

I used the shape of the Infinity urn pendant to guide my breath. Sounds crazy, but today the mind was unusually active. I decided I must have this urn necklace in gold. Not to use as an urn, but to remind me to breathe.
Today’s tip for better living: Stretch your side body!

Pet owners who favor the larger breeds will often choose our hand-painted ceramic Wolf Urn. Earlier this week, an Akita owner requested this urn style.

The problem? The Wolf urn only comes in two sizes, a large 200 cubic inch and a small keepsake size. We offer a similar style pet urn featuring various breeds with a capacity for larger dogs 85-120 pounds, but the clients are sold on the wolf urn. Recently we added two affordable alloy style urns that will accommodate up to 85 pounds. But for dogs of this size, the choices are limited.

On a side note, a Greyhound owner mentioned that the Greyhound was the only breed of dog mentioned in the bible.

Well, I had to know more. Yes, it’s true the Greyhound is specifically mentioned in the bible, (Proverbs 30:29-31, King James Version):

There be three things which go well, yea,
Which are comely in going;
A lion, which is strongest among beasts and Turneth not away from any;
A greyhound;
A he-goat also.

It’s all in the translation: The Hebrew phrase translated as “greyhound” literally means “girt in the loins.” This probably was considered by translators the most appropriate English term to describe the ancestor of the greyhound. It also didn’t hurt that the Greyhound was popular with the sixteenth century court of King James. (Source: courtesy of http://www.agreyhoundswish.org/hist_bible.htm)

Biblical references to dogs are not favorable, certainly not admired and loved as in our culture.